Sunday, August 01, 2010

Top 10 Reasons Not To Run

10. It's too nice outside... I'll get hot.
What, you've never heard of water bottles or sunscreen? Forgotten all those lovely, shady, through-the-forest running trails just down the street?

9. There are too many people outside. They'll stare at the fat chick and laugh.
a. Screw 'em. b. Who cares? Once the run is done, you'll be feeling a lot better than they will.

8. I'll huff and puff.
If you get out of breath, you have my permission to slow down. But you're going to go out there and try anyway.

7. I'll get red-faced and sweaty.
There will be a shower waiting for you when you get back.

6. There's a slight twinge in my left big toe.
If it's still bothering you after the warm up, we'll re-consider. But you're going out there anyway.

5. There's a really good movie on TV that I want to watch!
And there's a really good VCR waiting to tape it for you!

4. I'm really not in the mood.
Good to know. Now get your running clothes on.

3. But I need to wash the dishes, vacuum the house, re-shingle the roof, rake the lawn, and solve Global Warming first, before the run!
Laudable, but not plausible. Run first, solve Global Warming afterward. And put on your cotton socks.

2. My poor old dog will feel lonely if I abandon her.
And she'll feel delighted when you come back, especially if you smell interesting and give her a treat as an apology. Slip into those running shoes.

1. I -- don't -- wanna!
Shut up and start lacing the shoes.

Exercise du jour: Jogging 4 miles
Done! Silly as it sounds, writing all the feeble excuses down, and posting them publicly, really did help me get up out of the damn chair.

12 comments:

Gina Fit by 41, Maybe 42 said...

Brilliant. Love #4. I should print these out for my own motivation.

Cat said...

Lessee,

10. Yep, done that one. Found that I get up early, hey, it's NOT HOT. Get going.

9. I have to worry about animals, not people, so this one, avoid llamas. Avoid cat, avoid dog, go.

8. I do that most of the time anyway, so what's the difference? GO.

7. Read # 8. Although I am more red face than sweaty, usually. Move it!

6. Twinge. If it doesn't fall off, I am going. OUT THE DOOR!

5. Good shows are also available on Hulu, as the tv goes fritzy on me, so that excuse doesn't even work most of the time. GOOO!

4. Meh. Just go.

3. This is your body speaking. PRIORITIES. Take care of you, then solve everyone else's problems. Get OUT THERE!

2. My poor old dog goes with me, and now I have to go, or he is depressed. Go? We are going? Gogogo?

1. If you get up early enough, you are going before you are awake enough to argue with yourself. Especially if you skip the morning beverage...

I love your blog thoughts! One of those days I feel blabberish, hence the reply.

Cat

The Merry said...

Good responses, Cat. I'll have to use those sometimes. Especially the getting-it-done-a.m. one.

Thanks Gina! Sometimes it helps to publicly expose my inner slug and its feeble attempts at sabotage.

Hilary said...

Slave driver! ;) Funny stuff here, Merry.

Thanks for stopping by my blog. Twas nice to see you. :)

messymimi said...

Good for you!

When we write down our whining, it really does look petty and silly, doesn't it?

Xenia said...

I should do this myself. It would make me quick my bitchin' and get out the door a lot faster.

McB said...

Yay! 4 miles - very impressive.

AM-GoalsfortheWeek! said...

Mine's always 'You won't have enough time to cool down/get dressed afterwards' uh, okay then just cut the run short ~10 min!;-)

rssasrb said...

That's fantastic. And love the excuses conversation. I'll have to try it.

WheelDancer said...

What, the dog doesn't run with you?

The Merry said...

Oh, I /wish/ she were up to running with me! Used to have to walk her 4 miles a day just to take the edge off her energy level. Now she likes to supervise -- preferably from a warm and well-padded bed.

Missa said...

This should be a t-shirt. love this.

Cheers,
Missa
LosingEthel