Thank you for all the kind comments. I didn't know 40 people even read this blog, but I want you to know that I really appreciated each comment. Cried a bit when reading some of them.
This wouldn't have been such a shock, except it all happened so suddenly. I mean, I'd had this dog as a companion for 12 years. And yet from the time I came home, and saw the poor dog unable to get up, to the time when I walked out of the vet's office alone was a little less than an hour. The experience was surreal. I'm glad she didn't suffer very much, and she certainly seemed resigned to going, but even so.
Plus, I seem to be suffering from Phantom Dog Syndrome:
- I keep thinking I'll go out the back door and the dog will be sitting there waiting to greet me. It's a shock to have to remind myself that no, she won't be waiting there.
- It's really annoying to find that I have to keep reminding myself of this fact every time I go out the door. You'd think my subconscious would've gotten the message by this point.
- Worse than going out the door? Coming home and realizing there's no dog.
- On the plus side, I don't have any interest in food. My neighbors barbecued last night, and the woman, bless her, brought over a hamburger with all the fixin's. She went to a lot of trouble, setting the condiments on the side in their own little dish and adding extra bacon on top of the burger. It's interesting -- I admired the work she went to, thought that the food looked very edible, and still felt no urge to eat it. This too shall pass, I have no doubt.
On we go. I am again posting my exercise for the day. I'm intimidated by the thought of jogging 5.5 miles, and it would be easy to give up and forget this exercise stuff rather than try to do 5.5 miles. I'm not going to give up, just saying it would be easier than 5.5 miles. No doubt 5.5 miles will seem a much smaller distance when I'm contemplating it from the past rather than looking forward to it in the very near future.
Notice how I keep repeating the bit about 5.5 miles? Just the mere number intimidates me.
Watch this space for a gold star.
Update du 4:30 pm: really. I'm going out there. Any minute now.
Update du 6:30 pm:
Done! Finally. Had to walk part way, think I might have hurt my foot. Remember what I said about running changing your mood? Doesn't always work. Still, it's done.